Today I made a mistake

Today I made a mistake
I googled old friends
People once part of my life
And I saw how they trive

One a gold smith by 24
his own label, told my monitor
Newspaper articles about prodigy youth
And I thought, man look how he grew

Another one's business photos,
not a trace of inseurity in those
look at him smiling successional
he's now an IT professional.

Looking back, they both were kinda like me
albeit wonderful beings, a tad bit mentally wee
But look at them go, how they've beautifully grown
And now look at me, the never-changing moron.

How hard they must've being working
how deep they must've being searching
how strict they must've been
How much they must've seen

I would like to listen
to their aquired wisdom
what the world looks to them now
and what those pictures do not show

But what would I have to offer
I'm but a faceless gofer
a victim of my very own mess
checkmate in my own game of chess.

Because I cant do anything but cry
because mostly I dont even try
because somewhere along the line
I forgot which fight is mine.

Today I made a mistake
I compared myself to once-friends
and I forgot completely
to meet myself. Me.

Today I made a mistake
I googled old friends
but instead of being proud of their growth
I just moved to self-pity lake and dove.

I am so sorry.
Keep going, wonderful people